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WIMI: Being Authentic or Getting What You Want?

July 27, 20254 min read
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What is more important? Being Authentic or Getting What You Want?

Often we find ourselves in situations where we could lie to someone, ourselves, and get the thing we most desire. That temptation is usually pretty high because who would know except for ourselves? Most people might look at this as a no-brainer on the surface because doing the “right” thing is always the best option right? Lets explore this further.

Idea of Authenticity

To live authentically as it is expressed here can simply mean to live truthfully to your values and instead of going against the flow of your natural self you flow with it. Although! Your reality on your authentic self can always change. One day you thought authentically that you were a 4 year old, but now you don’t because that is not authentically who you are. 

I would argue though, that when it comes to morals, values, and beliefs, you are slightly more defined and firm. Life as we know it forces us to live in the gray as the situations seem to throw us off. If we are too rigid in our beliefs and values then do we risk breaking ourselves when the situation calls for some flexibility? What happens to us when we go against who we are?

Usually people become ill or have some dis-ease. They say that when you see someone who looks sickly or depressed that it usually means that they are out of balance with themselves. There is usually something in their life that is causing them to be in conflict within themselves. Then how do people do terrible things and seemingly not feel anything? I would propose that they do, and while we may not see it on the surface, their life may become more miserable.

And while being authentic to ourselves is the key to happiness - people still find peace in lying to themselves in hopes of escaping the pain of the truth of the world.

Idea of Getting What You Want

What, Do, You, Truly, Want? Most people go through life without a strong compass of any kind. No target they are aware of and are just floating through life in an unintentional way. It is no wonder then why so many people sacrifice themselves for things that are not actually important to them. You could ask most people what cause them to make a decision that goes against their beliefs and they might say that they do not know. Everyone may not consciously know what caused them to make a decision, but there is always a reason.

If we don’t know where we draw the lines, then we may make decisions that completely go against what we believe so easily. Knowing what we truly want out of a situation will always prove to increase your happiness with your choices. Know where you draw the line when it comes to your morals and authenticity. Feel free to give yourself some gray area and have a definite stopping point. Get what you want by knowing what you want and decide ahead of time where your hard limits are - and then stick to them!

So What is More Important?

The most important thing is knowing where you stand firmly in your beliefs and where you are choosing to live in the gray. Living authentically to yourself will make life easier in the sense that you will always know what decisions make you fulfilled and align with your beliefs. Getting what you want out of life and the different situations you are in is also important because that should be the result of living authentically to yourself. 

If you want to have the things you want out of life and also feel fulfilled and happy, then you must live authentically to yourself. There is always a way to live the way you want while also being true to yourself. This path just takes more work and dedication, and the whole time you will know what you are working towards and living for. No greater thing in life is there than this.

What are your thoughts on living authentically and getting what you want? Do you believe that one is more important than the other? What questions do you have?

Remember that the most important thing in life is your happiness and that nothing comes for free, and you can choose to live the life you want with the authenticity that will bring you the greatest joy and fulfillment if you put in the work. Your journey can be filled with support and friends. Nothing in life must be done alone except for you to make the choice every day to live fulfilled and joyful.


Owner and CEO of Reality Switch Coaching. Relationship expert and creator of the "water mirror method". Joohong has been married for about 10 years and shares his experiences with others so that they may foster the kind of love people only dream about. He has created this over the course of 10 years with his own relationship as he went from a relationship warzone to a relationship support zone.

Joohong Lange

Owner and CEO of Reality Switch Coaching. Relationship expert and creator of the "water mirror method". Joohong has been married for about 10 years and shares his experiences with others so that they may foster the kind of love people only dream about. He has created this over the course of 10 years with his own relationship as he went from a relationship warzone to a relationship support zone.

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